Match Reports – December 12 2013

1st XI

There is a gap at the top that has grown by the week for the last 3 weeks but enough about Scarney’s hair. Oddly though, just like Scarney’s hair the early appearance of a Christmas pedo jumper has also disappeared but, unlike the hair, could return.

Last game of 2013 has now gone. A fitting venue for a game against Purley Walcountians, themselves 5 points clear 5 weeks ago and a must win game for them. Only once had we won at the Carshalton Road ground and that against Walcountians before they had merged with Purley. A game in 1996 that saw Virge standing on the oppos goal line and getting an edge of one of my shots before it crossed the line before claiming the goal. Purley had been our nemesis in the previous 6 games against them. Tables needed turning.

All looked good. Kit Bag Page’s on off affair with his sports equipment was back on as it surfaced in JJ’s beer cellar. Good job it was not in Ceige’s car as Mrs Gray had cleaned out her son’s car during the week as a reward for his finding a job and one can only imagine what she would have done with the offending items that had been lurking for 3 weeks in South of England outposts.

Louis made the seriously elementary schoolboy error of admitting he was happy to start on the bench as he had a bad hangover and then promptly tried to break Skip’s arm in the last seconds of the warm up. Fair to say that the resulting performance in goal is evidence that for 2014 I am going to take a hammer with me to all games and during the team chat place Skip’s arm on a table before bringing the hammer down with some force on his left forearm.

4 minutes in and we were one up. Paddy’s run being ended with a kendo move by the flailing left back and the Carthusian boys too polite to score as JLT and Ceige passed the ball between themselves on the goal line as the short corner move went a little awry. Thankfully Ceige’s pass to JLT was misplaced and crept across the line.

Good chances came and went. The defence manfully repelled all attacks with Skip making a nuisance of himself in the D expertly wiping out the Purley forwards as he slid to clear. We shuffled our pack and reached half time with a precious lead.

35 minutes to go before round one of two was over. A win would probably give us a healthy advantage at the top looking at the other games. Purley just had to win so kitchen sink et al would be coming our way. So it proved to be. No clear cut open play chances for Purley but a number of short corners but no drag flick in sight. The game changed when JLT wanted to add to his West Hampstead moment of glory, deflecting a Purley shot that Skip somehow manged to turn round the post off his hip even though wrong footed.

From the resulting long corner we turned the ball over and, as with many other occasion this season, flooded out of defence and a few seconds later were 2 up. A slick move saw Kit Bag crash in a cross that Jay deflected into the keeper who made a horlicks of the looping ball for Ceige to double his tally of one yard to two and double his goal tally for the day. The watching Virge stood in admiration, 2 yards, 2 goals and the same end he stole the goal from in 1996.

The black and yellow shoulders drooped. Ours broadened. Of course they tried but nothing would get past our bloodied defence who threw everything in the way. They went down to 10 with 10 minutes to go. More corners, no drag flick and a well drilled defence were never troubled until….until Scarney needed a break. Another yellow card, short corner and stroke with 7 minutes to go. 2 – 1 as a zipped stroke meant Skip was beaten at last ” you needed that for your confidence” were his words as Stagno ran back to the half way line. Scarney reflected on another net loss of fantasy league points.

We drove the ball into the corners as the clock ran down. Vanden Ticker Tacker was in his element. The final whistle went and we bagged the points. 5 points clear but only half the job done. Purley were 5 points clear after our wobble in games 5 and 6 and now they are 8 behind so 5 is a mere bagatelle.

The beer tasted good ahead of our going our own ways for Christmas. New Zealand, Australia and Woking to name a few of the exotic destinations. 3 of the top 5 in the first 4 back with 2nd v 6th and 4th v 5th and us v 3rd in the first weekend of the resumption. Could be a big pointer as to how things will end up on March 29th.